Thursday, 17 December 2009 21:09
“Love one another is not just a Christian ideal in the United States. It is an intrinsic part of the culture. Bumper stickers with hearts can be found on any street in any city. Altruism is taught in schools and preached from every pulpit. Sentiments are to be expressed in kind deeds and not in hostile acts, which will be rewarded with punishment. Hostile children and adults alike are shunned.” (A Psychology of Missionary Adjustment by Marge Jones, Gospel Publishing House 1995; p.39) Jones continues this passage to say that one of the difficult cultural adjustments expatriates often have to make is the realization that altruism—what we commonly call “charity” or “good deeds” are simply not part of the everyday mindset of their host culture.
Until I moved here, I never stopped to think about this. But a year or so ago, I was in England and, having gone there straight from Russia, I remember being especially struck by the number of “charity shops” there: that is, second-hand stores where the profits benefit a certain charity. In the U.S. we have Goodwill and Salvation Army stores; in the UK, it seems that every neighborhood boasts a Heart Association shop, a Cancer Fund shop; an Animal Rescue-League shop; an Oxfam shop. I noticed it especially because of the resoundingly loud absence of any such thing in our city. Russia, it seems, is still in the “developmental stages” of their own philosophy of charity. In fact, sadly, most of the Russians we know—Christian or not… maybe especially Christians—seem to see their role as being deserving recipients of charity, rather than givers of it.
A couple of years ago, our friends Brian and Mary Dennett, who are missionaries among the poor in Guatemala, described a mudslide that covered part of their city. (Forgive me, Dennetts, if I have some of the details wrong.) Right away, their mission started a fund-raising effort to help those whose lives had been devastated by the disaster. Even the poorest Guatemalan children in their project schools began bringing in donations of money, clothing--whatever they had—to help those hardest hit. Those children were being trained to understand that there is always someone worse off than you are; there is always something you can give to others.
In this, our second year in Russia, we have slowly, reluctantly come to grips with the fact that charity is not a cultural ideal in Russia. This is hard for us to accept. To be honest, it seems cold and self-centered to us. We realize that we’re thinking like Americans here; we’re trying to adjust our mindset: not to judge too harshly; to make allowances for differences in history and culture. It’s still hard.
When altruism—the simple doing of good out of compassion—is not taught to people from an early age, then naturally they will not understand why anyone would want to do such a thing. Russians are always suspicious if we say we are here simply to help needy children….Why would anyone do that, unless there was some benefit in it for themselves? It’s too complicated to explain, so we’ve stopped saying it.
But it doesn’t mean we stop doing it. There’s something very purifying about having to do your good deeds in secret, as Jesus advised, knowing that if you draw attention to them, they’ll only be misjudged. Misunderstood. Possibly even stopped dead in their tracks.
This month, we had the great opportunity to donate 5 large boxes of new hats, mittens and scarves to a battered women’s shelter in the town where we teach English classes. Every one of those things was donated by you, our supporters, friends and family in America, and went to families where the dads are either drunk or abusive or gone, or by turns, all three. The moms need to clothe their kids this winter, but don’t have the means to do it… so you provided the means. Next week, we’ll go there again with gifts for the kids, so they’ll have something under their tree this holiday season.
Last Tuesday, Tim dropped me off at church to teach my usual English class and, in spite of a full New-England-scale snowstorm that was blowing, decided to go for a walk. As he passed a dumpster, he heard a voice, but…saw nobody to go with it. He followed the voice to its source: a hole in the street, where a man—either drunk or crazy or simple-minded or all three—was huddled against the storm, just below street level, talking to himself. Tim offered him a few minutes of better conversation and a bag of food, and went on his way. Sometimes, that's all you can do.
On Christmas Eve, we have been invited to visit a local Internat: a government-run boarding school for orphans—to deliver gifts and love. If you’ve kept up with our blogs and e-newsletters, you may appreciate what an impossibility—what a sheer, inexplicable miraculous chance this is, in a place that has firmly and repeatedly said, “No foreigners” in regard to its orphans. Thank you for praying: don’t stop now! (Also, donate. Somehow, we need to pay for the gifts.)
And meanwhile, when Russians ask, “What are you doing here?” We blandly reply, “Oh us? We're teaching English.” Because that’s also true, but it seems to be the only part of the truth that they can wrap their minds around.
Over and over this reminds me of Christ, who came purely to love, heal and save but was accused of everything but. Political ambition, religious heresy, pride, ladder-climbing… He was accused of all of them and worse. We get accused of those things too (and not just by Russians.) Like Christ, we are learning that the helplessness of being unable to give an answer can be a powerful place to be. “Do not be afraid or discouraged because of this vast army. For the battle is not yours, but God’s…. You will not have to fight this battle.” (2 Chron. 20:17)
This Christmas, more than ever, we are aware of and grateful for our charity-minded friends in America, who understand that often Christ’s love has to be tangible in order to be understood. Thank you for your financial gifts that make it possible to love kids over here. We know you already give a lot, and we don’t want to be simply The Next Charity who hits you up for money. But if you’ve somehow missed the Salvation Army buckets this year, and you want to be involved in our Christmas Eve Internat gift-giving, just send a donation with the note “Orphan ministry” to our account at WorldVenture. (Tim & Carre Gardner #222 WorldVenture 1501 W. Mineral Springs Ave, Littleton, CO 80120.)
The majority of Russians here may not get it, but we will, and so will the orphans.
And so will Jesus.
